you ask, i answer (part 3)

Hey friends! Todays post is another fun little Q&A! I asked you guys over on my blog Instagram (@blogbymere) to send me some questions to answer - so here we are!

I love doing these little Q&A’s so you can get to know me a little better (plus it sparks my creativity when I’m in a writing slump). SO I hope you enjoy this unqualified advice from a girl who is also going through life for the first time.

Get cozy, grab a coffee and let’s get into this.

Are you happy with the spot you're in? 

Yes, yes YES. I think I’ve finally let go of all the pressure I had been putting on myself to be perfect. I would often spiral thinking about the things that were “wrong” or “bad” about the past situations I’ve been in. I would waste time wishing I had more. I was constantly being hard on myself because I wasn’t “perfect” or because I felt behind in life. The spot I’m in right now is filled with so much peace because I’ve finally learned to appreciate every little detail in my current position. I am no longer striving perfection but am striving for contentment. Good or bad, I can now appreciate what is in front of me. Going with the flow is fun. I find peace in the unknown and rest knowing it’s in the Lords hands.

Here is what my life has been looking like lately at home:

Advice for feeling behind in life?

I feel like this question ties in perfectly to the previous one because feeling happy with the spot you’re in means letting go of the expectation that you should be somewhere else. I used to be very insecure at the fact that I still lived with my parents at 22 years old. I would get insecure because I didn’t go away to college like most of my friends. I would feel behind because I didn’t have a boyfriend, an apartment or a fancy degree yet. My eyes were constantly scanning everyone else around me. I couldn’t focus on my own victories or blessings because I was too consumed by what everyone else was doing. Remember that God has you exactly where He needs you. Just because someone else seems “ahead of you” doesn’t mean you’re doing bad, that you’re behind or forgotten. Your path is much different than the person next to you. God has a specific purpose for your life. When you feel behind in life, remind yourself of all the blessings you have around you. Enjoy every spot and season you are in. Each is filled with an abundance of blessings whether you see them or not. Remember you are not alone! Not everyone is on the same timeframe and that’s more than okay.

What’s a passion you thought you’d never get into?

Writing. I say it a million times but I used to hate writing. My lowest grade in school was always english. My dad literally wrote my papers for me up until my sophomore year of college (write your own papers, don’t listen to me). Up until recently I hadn’t realized writing was actually a serious hobby of mine. I never thought of writing as an act of creative expression for myself either but here we are! Here YOU are! Reading my writing! How sick is that! Sharing my passion with you! After reading this I encourage you to go try out a new hobby. Seriously. Report back in a month. We’re gonna grow new hobbies together.

Favorite thing about where you live?

I actually used to strongly dislike my hometown and Michigan in general (so sorry Michigan I love you now). After being away from home for awhile, I developed a deep appreciation for Michigan. I think my favorite thing is the sense of comfort and familiarity it brings. Since I live in a semi-small town, life is pretty simple. You see the same faces, go to the same restaurants and get to drive past your friends houses everyday.

It’s like a little Stars Hollow.

(my mom and I running “errands” aka getting coffee and shopping everyday) I fully think I’m Rory Gilmore when I’m at home.

Anyways, I love the simplicity and easy living my little hometown brings. It’s gentle, it’s intentional and it’ relaxing. Of course there are days where I want to bust out of here and run away, but that feeling can come with any place if you linger too long. Michigan is a beautiful state and I will defend my home forever. I seriously love being home (my family may contribute to this opinion but still). Just appreciate where you are. Try your best to focus on the positives around you. There’s a reason you’re here. Enjoy it.

How do you handle “failure”

Failure is not permanent. Failure is one big learning experience. It makes you a better person. It builds understanding and sparks growth. Experiencing a temporary failure whether that be in work, school or relationships is never easy. Learning to be kind to yourself during these moments also isn’t easy. It’s a work in progress. Learn to treat yourself with kindness when things don’t go as expected. See these moments as a learning opportunity. Recognize where you can do better, where you can grow or where you can gain a better understanding. Trust me, in the end you’ll be glad that you experienced that temporary moment of failure because it will lead you to a greater victory. Learning to appreciate failure is tough, it never gets easier - but the growth that comes after is beautiful.

How to make meaningful friendships in your 20’s

I’m 22, so I’m still figuring out friendships. I can tell you this - the “best friends” you’ve had throughout high school may not carry over into your 20’s. This doesn’t mean that they’re terrible friends or awful people, it just means that you’re growing. Your time in your 20’s is extremely valuable. You’re changing and learning about yourself everyday. The people you surround yourself with actually make an impact on you. So it’s important to choose wisely. Pray for your friendships and recognize how certain people make you feel. I trust that the Lord will provide cup-filling friendships in your life. We’re so young that we have yet to meet some of our favorite people yet. I find this to be true because I still am continuing to find amazing friendships when I’m not looking. We’re all figuring out life together for the first time so be gentle with yourself and trust that God will provide.

What cameras do you have?

I have to break up the deep questions with some fun ones right? I have a couple because I LOVE cameras. The main one I use for vlogging is my Canon M50 (although I’m looking to upgrade soon send me some recommendations hehe). I also carry around my new little digital camera I stole from my dad! Then I have way too many film cameras to count… My favorite one at the moment is my little Pentax point and shoot. I did in fact drop it at a football game last fall so it’s slightly broken- but it still works the same. Anyways this is your sign to get a camera and start documenting life’s little precious moments.

Are you currently in college?

Yes! I never talk about school or really show it online but I am taking classes. I’m currently a junior in college (slowly but surely we are getting there). I take online classes and am pursuing my degree in digital design - visual communications. I did classes at my local community college in Michigan for two years but absolutely hated it. I was at my absolute lowest when I was in community college, I really was just not doing well mentally - this is something I for sure talk about another time if you’re interested. So after classes went online I decided to take a break altogether from school.

This 19 year old Mere rotting in college btw:

During my gap year I went to Hawaii for a bit and began to find myself and fall back in love with life again. My time in college was rough for me so the idea of going back scared me. I was afraid that old insecurities, worries and habits would come back into my life if I went back to school. After my time in Hawaii and in Michigan for the summer, I really felt the Lord place it on my heart that I should go back to school. I was worried and frankly not thrilled about this idea but the process for applying was so seamless that I felt really confident going back. MORAL OF THE STORY, I really enjoy the classes that I’m taking and school has played an important part in my life recently. I’m proud of myself for deciding not to give up. Not to mention, it’s given me the opportunity to really channel my inner Rory Gilmore this fall once classes start back up again.

What has God shown you through your travels?

I don’t even know where to start. I feel like every time I come back home from a trip I know Him on such a deeper level. I have always had a lot of anxiety about flying alone, meeting new people and leaving my house/family. Lately I’ve been learning to trust God with SO much more. He’s given me so much freedom from my anxiety and has helped me find comfort in traveling alone - something I truly thought I’d never get over. I feel as if the Lord has shown me how deep my love for people is through traveling too. Everywhere I travel, even if it’s a simple as a new tiny city in Michigan, I’m greeted with such a deep love and appreciation for the people around me. I have met some of my favorite people just by stepping out of my comfort zone and saying yes to where the Lord calls me. His love is so sweet. He’s so intentional. No matter where I go, I am constantly seeing the Lord show up.

CHILDHOOD ACTIVITIES YOU WANT TO START DOING AS AN ADULT?

Okay I don’t know if this is the proper answer you’re looking for but - this summer I really want to start implementing more childhood activities into my daily little routine like:

- riding my bike

- getting ice cream literally whenever i want

- i really want to get a nice game of four square going in the neighborhood?

(this feels more like a summer bucket list I’m so sorry)

- low key going to bed early?

- creating without fear of judgement

Something that’s been on my heart a ton is the word childlike. For a long time I was extremely insecure about “acting childish.” I hated feeling “cute” instead of mature or “little” when I was the oldest one in the group. These past couple months in particular, the Lord has revealed to me how much of a blessing this childlike joy actually is. I think it’s so important to continue to do the things you loved as a child all the time. Create like children - unafraid of what the world has to say. Create with joy knowing that Lord sees you perfect in His eyes. Create knowing that no matter how “messy” or “imperfect” your art is, your Father will still proudly hang it on the fridge.

With that being said, I hope this summer is off to an amazing start for you. I hope you run around like a little kid again. I hope you gaze at the sky like it’s the first time you’ve ever seen a sunset and grin as the wind whips through your hair making it all messy like how it was when you were young. I hope you experience childlike joy and rediscover the things that brought you happiness as a child. You are His beloved child - find peace in that.

If you read all the way to the end, I LOVE YOU!

Thank you for asking me questions - they really got me excited to write again! Hopefully I answered them properly and in a way that is helpful to you. If you’re up to it, I encourage you to sit down and ask yourself some of these same questions. Write them down, express yourself and learn more about who you are.

(and if you feel comfortable, I would love to see how you answered these questions so please send me some of your answers! I want to get to know you as well)

Alright, you are amazing and you are so loved.

Have an amazing day

Can’t wait to talk to you so soon

xoxo, MERE